Transitions:
Making Sense of Life’s Changes
William
Bridges
Perseus
Books Publishing, 1980
Pages:
170
About
the Author:
William
Bridges (1933-2013) began a major transition in his own life in 1974: he quit
his job as a professor of American Literature to become…well…he wasn’t sure at
the time what he was becoming. His second career description might read:
speaker- consultant-counselor-writer, focusing on the transition process. He
spent the greater part of the second half of his life speaking, consulting,
counseling, and writing to help people and organizations make the most of the
transitions in their lives. This book, Transitions: Making the Most of
Life’s Changes,
is the first of several best selling books by Bridges on the transition
process.
Analysis
of Content
Transitions,
by
design, is a book with wide application. In it Bridges discusses his own
transitions, those of his counseling clients, those of his students, those of
tribal initiation rituals, and those transitions implicitly and explicitly
described in literature and ancient myth. He attempts to paint a universally
recognizable picture of the transition process – ending, then “neutral zone,”
then beginning – that is flexible enough to be used and referred to by people
making and enduring many different types of changes. This broad applicability,
I believe, is both the great strength and weakness of this book. His outline of
transition is general enough to be helpful in almost any situation, but because
of this openness and generality I found myself wanting more specificity, more
data. In other words, he makes a great argument, but he doesn’t really give the
reader any way to verify or falsify his work. He refers mostly to personal
anecdotes, the writings of other social analysts, and Jungian analysis of myth
and ritual. Transitions is more memoir and “self-help” psychology than it is “social
science.” This is by no means a “failure” on Bridges’ part! I don’t think he
intended to write a sociological study on modern transition processes. I just
wish that he could have written that book, too! I wonder if in his later books
on transition he attempts to use surveys and other data gathering techniques to
support his literary and personal groundwork. I really enjoyed his writing,
especially his use and interpretation of the Oedipus cycle. I recommend it to
any and all.
Points
of Interest
1.
The basic outline of the transition process, he says, “begins with an ending:”
something about us or in our lives ends. Sometimes we want the ending.
Sometimes we don’t. Sometimes we deny it. But we can’t transition and transform
without there first being an ending, writes Bridges. Then comes the “neutral
zone” – a “fallow” time when life feels dead, out of whack, and/or chaotic.
This neutral zone is very important for us, Bridges insists; it is a time when
the primordial chaos out of which we came can stir-up once more; it is a seed
bed for the new beginning toward which we strive. Then comes the new beginning,
which is always “untidy,” he says. In the least ‘successful’ transitions, so to
speak, the new beginning is just a repetition of what just ended. In fact,
Bridges says, such transitions really have “skipped” either the ending or the
neutral zone. In the best transitions, on the other hand, this new beginning is
driven by a deeper understanding and a more-whole self.
2.
Bridges draws on the riddle of the Sphinx of Thebes to describe the ongoing
transition that we experience. “What animal walks on four feet in the morning,
two feet at noon, and three feet in the evening, yet has only one voice?”
Oedipus guessed correctly – the human being – and became ruler of Thebes. The
first phase of life – childhood – is about dependence, experimentation,
identity development, play, and learning. The second phase – adulthood – is
about independence, work, relationship, commitment to the “tribe” and family,
self-definition and continued self-discovery. Instead of focusing on the “mid-life
crisis,” Bridges describes adulthood as a series of “crises,” a rhythm of “expansion
and contraction,” where one crisis sometimes sticks out as the “big one.” The
third phase doesn’t really have a name (elderhood?), but Bridges describes it
as a time of deeper connection, interrelatedness, and wisdom – more concern for
meaning and less for production.
3.
Transitions
describes more than it prescribes – but it does lay out ten tips for dealing
with transition: “1. Take your time.
2. Arrange temporary structures. 3. Don’t act for the sake of action. 4.
Recognize why you are uncomfortable. 5. Take care of yourself in little ways.
6. Explore the other side of the change. 7. Get someone to talk to. 8. Find out
what is waiting in the wings of your life. 9. Use this transition as the
impetus to a new kind of learning. 10. Recognize that transition has a
characteristic shape.”
4.
Bridges writes of four aspects of endings: Disengagement – no longer being
involved in the job, relationship, neighborhood, life-style, etc.;
Disidentification – no longer describing ourselves (internally and externally)
as being “of” that job, relationship, neighborhood, life-style, etc.;
Disenchantment – learning the “truth” underneath the “myths” and stories that
supported or constituted whatever it was that just ended; Disorientation – no
longer knowing which way is up, which way to go, which way is forward. This is
the entrance to the twilight, I mean, the neutral zone.
5.
Tips for the neutral zone: “1. Find a regular time and place to be alone. 2.
Begin a log of neutral zone experiences. 3. Take this pause in the action of
your life to write an autobiography. 4. Take this opportunity to discover what
you really want. 5. Think of what would be unlived in your life if it ended
today. 6. Take a few days to go on your own version of a passage journey.”
6.
Tips for beginning anew: “1. Stop getting ready to act and act. 2. Begin to
identify yourself with the final result of the new beginning. 3. Take things
step by step. 4. Diffuse your purpose and transfer it from the goal to the
process of reaching the goal.”
Personal
Reaction
I’m
feeling pretty tired of transition, to be honest. From high school to college
to a handful of jobs, through several deep relationships and several different
communities…I don’t think of myself as a transient but that’s kind-of what I’ve
been over the first decade of my adulthood. Don’t get me wrong I’ve had a great
life! Lots of great experiences. I’ve had my psychological ups and downs, but
I’ve very few complaints about my journey. In fact I’m very grateful, when I
stop to think about God’s goodness to me! But I guess that’s the point – I’ve
been moving so much that I haven’t so often stopped to think about God’s
goodness. Transition has been exciting and fun, but I think part of my call to
Richmond Hill has been a call to find ways to settle down to the bottom even as
the water of life continues to run toward the ocean. Stability in transtion.
This
book has given me some good words and ideas to apply to my life, to the life of
Richmond Hill, and to the life of all the relationships and organizations of
which I am a part. My biggest take-away from Transitions is the encouragement to
be consciously involved in my life’s transitions. Whether I initiate the
transitions or not, Bridges advises me to take time to think about and engage
in the endings, the “neutral zone,” and the new beginnings that are a part of
my life and of all life.
Practical
Presentation
10 min discussion activity in two’s or
three’s. Three topics: pg 15, pg 125, Biblical characters
